Error

Conversation:

Boy: "Gusto ko sanang magreklamo tungkol sa ngipin ko kaso lang eh baka pagsabihan mo nanaman ako kaya hindi ko na lang irereklamo."

Girl: "Hahaha, alam mo na yon! Ano pa bang aasahan ko sayo aber? Sira-sirang ngipin at sunog na baga? Eeeww!"

Boy: "Tsk tsk tsk. Salamat sa realizations ha? Pupwede namang huwag nang umasa eh."

Girl: "Ewan ko sayo. Sige, sabi mo. Madali naman akong kausap eh. Anyway. sleep na ako."

Boy: "Sige goodnight."

Sapagkat kahit kailan, hinding-hindi na mababago ang pagiging bulok ni Boy sa tiyempo at pagbibitaw ng salita. Mga salitang magpapakunot ng iyong noo at mag-uutos sa iyong magpaalam ng biglaan para hindi na masundan pa ng mga walang kwentang kataga ang nauna nang binitawang pahayag. Nasira ang gabi ni Boy pero ang mas karumal-dumal doon ay sinira ni Boy ang gabi ni Girl.

Masama ito. Natulog pa si Boy ng may problema. Isang mapait na usapang gugustuhin na lamang niyang ibaon sa sulok ng mga panaginip at manalig na sana burado na ang lahat. Ang mga napag-usapan, ang mga nasambit, at ang walang kakwenta-kwentang pagrarason.

Sayang. Kung ang mga kaisipang tulad nito'y naging isang pagod na lamang na maaaring mapawi ng tulog. Subalit hindi. Ang naganap na pag-uusap ay tatatak sa isipan ni Girl at dadalhin niya ito hanggang sa kung kailan niya gustuhin. Hindi epektibo ang isang gabing pagtulog para sa ganitong klase ng alitan.

Boy: *Isinusumpa ko ang katauhan kong ito. Kahit gaano mo iwasang makapanggulo ng buhay ng may buhay, lalabas at lalabas talaga ang kagaguhan ng ugali at di na muli pang maiiayos ang mga bagay-bagay*

Kung mayroon mang pagkakataon na gagamitin laban kay Boy ang mga salitang nasambit niya ay marahil sa panahon ito ng pagbabalik ni Boy kay Girl.

Para saan pa ba ang pagbabalik ni Boy? Sa anong dahilan?

Natatakot siguro si Boy. Minsan na din kasi siyang umibig subalit nagpakaboloks siya't hindi niya ito binigyan ng sapat na halaga. Marupok ang kanyang kasanayan sa ibang bagay at duwag siyang masira ang mga bagay kung sasama siya kay Another Girl.

Pero ngayon, nilampaso na ng tadhana ang kapalaran ni Boy. Nananatiling isang uhuging batang walang matitirahan ang kanyang buhay-pag-ibig. Isang piraso ng papel na patuloy ang pagbasak sa isang malalim na bangin. Walang direksiyon at walang pupuntahan. Parang isang rumaragasang bato na madudurog sa dulo ng pagkakagulong nito mula sa burol.

Kung tutuusin, nasasanay na din si Boy na wala si Girl sa buhay niya. Minsan na din niyang naitanong kung karapat-dapat pa nga ba siyang maging tagapagbigay-ligaya kay Girl kung ang sarili niyang ugali, buhay, at katauhan ay hindi niya maiakma sa simpleng hiling ni Girl. Nasaan pa ba ang kaligahayan doon? Wala. Kung ang mga simple, hindi magawan ng paraan, saan ka maghahanap ng paraan para sa komplikadong mga bagay?

Marahil ay ganoon na nga lamang ang kapalaran ni Boy. Hindi siya angkop sa panlasa ni Girl at wala siyang balak pang guluhin ang matiwasay at maligaya pang buhay ni Girl. Alam naman ni Boy na maligaya na at mas liligaya pa si Girl sa piling ni Another Boy. Suwerte na si Girl kay Another Boy at gayun din naman si Girl kay Another Boy.

Lumilipas ang panahon. Natututo ang mga tao. Nagkakaroon ng katuturan ang mga pananaw nila sa buhay. Habang tumatagal, nagbabago ang tingin mo sa kung ano ang mahalaga at malalim kaysa sa mga dapat na balikan na puro naman kababawan. Ang kahulugan ng pag-ibig ay nababago mula sa simpleng pagsasambit ng "mahal kita" patungo sa mga bagay na makapagbibigay sa iyo ng lubos na ligaya tulad ng pagiging mahusay na kasama salahat ng oras, sa carnival man o sa comedy bar, maging sa mga panahon na nalulumbay ka't pasan mo ang daigdig.

Kung saan mang puntong babawiin ni Boy si Girl eh walang nakaalam. Marahil hindi na din magpupumilit si Boy. Wala nang lugar sa paghingi ng paumanhin sapagkat mayroong 90% hindi ito tatanggapin at magmimistulang isang pelikulang mahigit isandaang beses nang naipalabas sa iisang istasyon ng telebisyon.

Tatanggapin na lamang niya ang mga wikang masasambit ni Girl.

Maaaring ito ay ang mga sumusunod (O di kaya'y malapit sa kaisipan ng mga sumusunod):

1. Hindi ka lumaban/Hindi mo ako ipinaglaban.
2. Simple lang ang gusto ko, hindi pa mapagbigyan.
3. Wala kang kwenta.
4. Walang saysay ang buhay mo.
5. Hindi na kita gusto pang makasama sa buhay ko.
6. Ano man sa kombinasyon ng lima.

*Paunawa, ang mga naturang salita ay hindi tumutugma sa katauhan ng magsasalita.*

Ano ngayon ang kahahantungan ni Boy? Wala. Mamumuhay siya ng hindi na iisipin pa ang kinabukasan nila ni Girl. Ika ni Boy, dadating yun kung dadating. Sa kasalukuyan, magmamasid na lamang siya sa kaligayahang tinatamasa ni Girl at Another Boy kahit sa kalooban niya'y hitik ang pighati at sakit na nadarama.

Hindi na lalaban si Boy. Hindi dahil sa duwag siya subalit ayaw niyang sirain ang buhay ni Girl. Tatapusin na niya ang kanyang pantasya at babalik siya sa katotohanang hindi malayong magkatotoo ang plano ni Another Boy para kay Girl. Magiging maligaya siya sa payapang pagsasama ni Another Boy at Girl sa loob ng tatlong taon.

"Mabuhay ang bagong kasal." Ito na lamang ang masasambit ni Boy sa mga susunod pang taon.

Ayaw na ni Boy na maging H-Monster pa siya sa buhay ni Girl -- Ang H-Monster na lubos nang kinasusuklaman ni Boy.

Ayaw na niyang maging isa pang H-Monster.

Sapat na ang isa. Mamatay sana si H-Monster.

Kumbaga sa wakas ng isang pelikula, lilingunin na lamang niya ang landas na pinanggalingan, ngingiti ng bahagya, lalakad papalayo at hindi na muli pang lilingon muli, na ang mga kamay ay nakapamulsa at mayroong hanging banayad na umiihip.

Paalam.

Legga Più...

Paint

Makulay
by Sancho Delubyo

Purity in white
Drenched sorrow in black
Health in green
Rage in red
Calmness in blue
Energy in yellow
Disgust in brown
Happiness in orange
Mellowness in purple
Sweetness in peach
Playfulness in pink
Dismay in gray
Thoughtfulness in indigo

These are the colors that I see
And they shine the brightest
Within your eyes
And how I wish
I'd forever be captivated by the radiance of your smiles
Because you are shades of orange
In this transparent life of mine

Legga Più...

Plasticity

Tupperware
by Mariano


Madalas kong masilayan
Sa bawat isa sa iyong mata
Ang bawat pighati
Sa kabila ng pagngiti

Bakas sa bawat kurba
Ng iyong mga labi
Ay nagkukubli ang mga luha
Na nagpipigil pumatak

Alam man ng madla
Maging ng buong mundo
Ang kaligayahan na tinataglay
Ikaw naman, sa aki'y bukung-buko

Nagpaparty ka gabi-gabi
Pilit nilulunod ang sarili
Nagpapakasasa sa alak
Subalit sa kalungkutan pa din nakalagak

Makinang ang iyong pigura
Parang diyamanteng nakasisilaw
Lingid sa kaalaman ng lahat
Plastik lang ang iyong ligaya

Kailan ka magigising
Sa pagtulog mo sa kalungkutan
Kailan mo matatamo
Ang wagas na kaligayahan

Plastik na kaligayahan
Ang nakabalot sa iyo
Nawa'y tumapang ka
At harapin mo ang totoo

Legga Più...

Sancho Delubyo

Profile

Name: Sancho Delubyo
Nickname: Boy Tulog
Sex: Male
Age: 22
Zodiac Sign: Scorpio
Birthday: November 01

Personal Information:

I has a quite long curly hair with curls at the end. I am breathe and blink alternately. Favorite foods is rice and ulam viand with free iced tea.

Son of mother and father. Sibling to brother and sister. Uncle to the niece and nephews. Introvert neighbor. Big smile. Is love Sarsi with Vanilla in the glass.

Single with no double in life. Is love online life and friends with anyone who is friend him.

Loving to look at girls with cute facial pictures. Is very very good in not doing anything or passing of the time.

Is liking to drink with social and make happy times with anyone.

Is also very like to write and less of time to read and make read some books.

Is liking WWE and UFC but not watching regular times because Jack TV is no more inside our televisor.

Is funny, some persons say and is laughable with friends on true-to-life.

Is also like love stories and likes to cry when events are cryable. Watching love stories is like for him even it is not for him because he is looking like a killer.

Likes some sport but not all, and also drinking coffee and eating munchkins at the morning.

I is planning to study lessons of different kinds but I am always late with my brains.

That is what is all, thank you very so many.

-Profile inspired by Bb. Pilipinas - World and Chonamae

Legga Più...

Smudged

You and I always talk. I know what you feel and how you've tackled life all through these years.

I know because I am your bestfriend. I am the only guy that can stand you when everyone else is fed up with the shit that you give them. You are not a good person, but because they are too blind to see that.

I know even a day before you die, you'd change your ways and so I can tell the whole world about you, and how you changed for the best.

I know how you always argue with Tito and Tita about your studies, your nightlife and your friends from the other side of the society. You know, the ones who are always up to no good? Yeah, that's what you consider your friends now.

I know how they always threaten you about taking away your car and your allowance, your phone, your condo unit, and all those rich-ass property you have. I know that, because I was always there. I was the one driving your car whenever you're too wasted going home from those parties and cleaning your condo unit and searching for your phone whenever you are a "bit" drunk.

I was always the one facing both your parents whenever you arrive late and smothered in alcohol.

Well, I did my best telling Tita that it's not a very good idea talking to you in that state of yours. I know how you behave, better than anyone else in your family. And I know you'd just fuck your answers up and they'd just be more furious.

I don't know if I'm going to be flattered every time they'd tell me how they wished that I was their child and that they'd pick me over you. And everytime they tell that, I'd give my best to explain to them that you're just you, and nothing can change that, and that the best to thing to do is to love you and give their most golden understanding that they have in their body just for you.

I don't want them to ever tell it in front of you that your a problem child and that you're a disgrace. Believe me, you will see me in my worst form if ever they treat you with little affection at all.

I was there when you first got your heart broken. Heck, I was always there whenever you get hurt. It's funny eh? I must be the cause of all your badluck. But you must give me credit though, I am the only guy that would stay with you when you'd eat everyone else around you.

Remember when Christa took your favorite pen? Yeah, it was in gradeschool and the both of you squared it off like you're two boys on a sugar rush. I was shouting for you to stop it, like I was the girlfriend asking to stop the fight between his boy and the other boy.

You got the pen, and the sanction from the Disciplinary Office. I was of course the lawyer and was giving my best set of googly eyes to please Mr. Ballestre to lift that punishment of yours.

All throughout these years I was the janitor who cleaned up your mess after mess after mess. And I don't mean your condo unit.

And I am fucking happy that I am the bestest bud you have around. I won't get tired. I won't grow impatient. I am your sidekick. For better or for worse. Usually for worse.

Our prom wasn't that good yesterday eh? I saw you from the buffet table that you were arguing with Fernan. I wonder if you saw him cheating on you again. And again. And again.

I know you're tired of hearing this but..."I told you so."

I was waiting for that smiling moment. That you'd smack Fernan's teeth straight right inside his brain. But I was surprised you just walked away. Like a zombie. No emotions and with a blank face. He didn't even go after you, that fucking Fernan. You didn't explode at that moment. I was kind of proud and disappointed. Proud because I know you've given up and just let it go at that very moment. And disappointed because Fernan didn't die from your furious punches and your hands are blood-free.

I followed you to your car.

Don't be that frustrated. Hey, you're too pretty to let that moment ruin you. You've gotten your expensive make-up ruined again. It's all smudged up. It's a shame though, you're too pretty for this event, and yet you are crying your soul out inside this car. Away from all the people who know how strong you are. Away from all your fake friends. Away from all who knew how aggressive and arrogant you can be. They'd be surprised if they see you crying. The ever bitchy and cat-fighter girl that you are.

The Queen of the Night award was a shame eh? I know you could've won it, but you weren't there when they called you for the presentation of candidates. You were too busy crying. They wouldn't like a melted pretty face up on that stage.

Fernan won the Prom King award, and that new girl of his too. More like Prawn King and Prawn Queen award. What's her name? Rina? Sheesh, fuck that slut, haha. That self-centered mirror-addict fucking fucky fuck Rina. She and her slutty friends can just go and self-populate themselves. Sheesh.

Fernan doesn't deserve you. For all I know, no one deserves you. All these time it's all heartaches. I'm more tired than you are. I'm amazed on how you can just get off through that with a few buckets of tears and beer.

You don't have the trophy and the title as Prom Queen.

All you have is this car, and my shoulder. Go ahead, cry all you want. I've got this super-absorbent polo bought out just for your tears.

No one deserves you. No one but me.

You looked incredibly beautiful tonight, even if you've got your mashed up face and grimey lipstick.

I wonder if I could take care of you forever?

Would you give me the chance? I can put up with your tantrums, and every little shit that you can throw me.

I want to wipe that smudged make-up of yours, and never-ever make you feel worthless at all, never-ever again.

Legga Più...

Flowers

There she was, garnering all the flashes of the camera. She was all-smiles, surrounded by all her visitors.

She was wearing her long, black, sparkling, and elegant gown.

One by one, her guests took her hand. One by one they placed those glimmering tulips on her hand. Those flowers were as fresh as the morning mist.

Every movement was calculated. Thank goodness for the rehearsals and the cruel instructors. They would've never made it in time.

Each of the partners' dance was perfect. The timing was right, the steps were fit enough to be called heavenly. This night was truly something to remember.

It was her night after all. Again all the flashes of the cameras came and all her guests delivered the very best claps that they have.

Her smiles were nothing compared to mine. Before the night ended, mom and dad gave their speeches to the guests. They really have to make it public. They really have to use the microphone on how they vigorously proclaim that she is the one and only pride of our family.

Every officemates, business partners, and family friends have to hear that you are the brightest among the two of us.

The scholar.
The magna cumlaude.
The model.
The ultra-talented daughter.
The beautiful and lovely Adelaida.

Yeah, it always had to be this way. I was always under the shadow of your glory. I was always the unknown child.

Everytime that they we have so-called family gathering, you were the only daughter there is and I had to stay in my room.

For what? For just a simple reason of I-am-not-worthy.

Don't you ever get tired of being a trophy?

Well, I do. I am so tired. I am tired at the sight of you, being their trophy. I always am tired of you hogging all the attention. Everyday I get sick of all the praises you get from them. I never existed.

You are the smarter one -- Magna Cum Laude, academic scholar, a council member of an international social organization, and a leader of a youth foundation is what you are.

I am smart too. I got a 90 on my latest average and I give tutoring services to our neighbors. And I always try my best in school and especially at what I do.

You are the prettier one -- Modelling activities here and there, promotions for our family business, and social gatherings with mom and dad. You were always radiant and glamorous.

Uhm, I was once featured in a school poster too you know. My classmates said I was pretty even though I'm not at the center.

You are the talented one -- You're into sports(and a lot of them too), you can sing beautifully, and you can dance perfect enough to win a contest. You can play classical tunes with your guitar as good as the ones we see at concerts.

Well, I can play the guitar, and my teachers says I'm really good at it.

I wonder when mom and dad will even notice that I am doing great at school and helping out others. And that I am really good-looking even if I don't wear any make-up and that I can play lots of good tunes with this guitar of mine.

I know you know these things about me. And most especially, I know that you actually know how I feel. But you never ask. It's as if you were just a robot with no emotions. Yes you are a good child. Yes you are a what every single parent wants. And yes, you are the best person in our whole family.

But you were never a good sister. I know you were not always like that. I really love and adore you when we were young. But you've changed. You've changed a lot. You were eaten by all these extravagance and pride that you forgot that I existed.

You forgot your little sister that has always adored and loved you throughout these times.

You took all the love from me, Adelaida.

Well, I hope you are happy now. You can rest well now, and get off from all these activities of yours.

You're just there in bed, struggling to stay alive with that life support of yours. I hope you liked the flowers in your room. They're from me. I planted them myself, in the garden that we used to play. In the very same garden that the closest sisters in the world used to stay.

That was us.

I guess I should'nt have hit you too hard on the head. I'm sorry. And I know that pushing you down that high staircase of ours would cause you pain and probably death. Again, I am sorry.

But you should be sorry too. For ruining my life. For taking away mom and dad's love from me. For being so perfect.

And now mom and dad is having a hard time on how they're going to tell our neighbors, family friends, business partners and officemates on how you accidentally fell on the staircase and hit your head on the floor.

Suits them well. Let them have a hard time covering up the insanity that their worthless, younger daughter brought up.

Fine. Go ahead. Tell them everything that is necessary to not know how you ended up being dependent on a life support. It's a pitiful tragedy that this ever happened to our perfect family, Adelaida.

Oh, I'm sorry. To YOUR family, is what I really mean.

Well at least mom and dad did great on covering up for the two of us. For your little accident, and my trip to the asylum.

International education really is a very good cover-up.

I hope you liked those flowers. I planted them myself.

Legga Più...

Vday

Isang araw sa isang taon, nagmamahal ang bulaklak.
Dumadami ang konsumo ng tsokolate.
Mahaba ang pila sa Motel.
Madami ang kumakain sa mamahaling restaurants.

Lahat ito naganap sa isang araw na hinihintay ko ding dumating ngayong taon.

Nagdaan lahat ang mga bagay na ito sa aking mga mata. Tsokolate at bulaklak. Mga magkasintahang napakatamis ng samahan at nagsusubuan pa ng ulam sa isang sosyal na kainan. Mga sunod-sunod na pasok ng sasakyan sa mga Motel na talaga namang mapapailing ang mga pari at madre na sapagkat malamang ay iilan lamang dito ang may basbas ng matrimonyo ng kasal.

Ano nga ba ang dahilan at hinihintay ko sa araw na ito? Para sa isang taong nag-iisa lang naman sa buhay at walang itinuturing na espesyal na kasama ay isang malaking kahibangan para antayin pa ang araw na ito. It's a big fucking joke, or a fucking big joke, alin man ang mauna sa big at fucking, joke pa din ito.

Mataas din ang paghahangad kong maging maligaya ng lubos sa inaasahan sa araw na ito. Sa paanong paraan ay yun na ang malaking kababalaghan na tinatamasa ko.

Hindi naman laging ganito. Natatandaan ko pa din naman noon ang mga pangyayari.

Planado na ang lahat. Susundo ako dala ang regalong nakaubos ng isang buong araw para lamang makita ko. Kasama naman nito ang tsokolate at bulaklak. Iintayin kang makatapos sa paghahanda mo at pagbibihis na kahit abutin pa ng isang taon ay mananatili pa din akong excited sa paghihintay. Paglabas mo ng kwarto mo ay tila ba ako'y nasabugan ng atomic bomb ng kaligayahan. Napakaganda mo at perpekto ka ngayong araw na ito. Wala na akong hahanapin pa.

Magpupunta sa kung saang mall, manunood ng sine, kakain, magpapalipas oras habang umiinom ng 140 pesos na kape, at magkukuwentuhan ng mga bagay na tayo lang ang nakakaintindi kahit Tagalog din naman ang salita natin. Isang araw na punung-puno ng komersiyalismo.

Matatapos ang buong araw at uuwi tayo na taglay ang kaligayahan natin sa ating mga puso. Mamaalam ako sa iyo sabay mahihiyang manghingi ng isang halik. Halik na mauuwi sa isang gabing punung-puno ng makamundong pagnanasa gamit ang ating mga katawan at mga makakating mga isip.

Masaya sana kung ganun ang sitwasyon ngayon. Pero niloloko ko lang pala ang sarili ko kung umaasa pa akong matutupad ang mga plano ko para sa araw na ito.

Kumpleto ang lahat. Mayroon akong kotseng gagamitin sa pagsundo sa iyo. May bulaklak, tsokolate, pabangong nabanggit mong gusto mong bilhin. May kasama pang sulat at stuff toy. Planado na ang bagay na nakasanayan natin. May sobra pang dinner reservations sa isang sosyal na hotel.

Ikaw na lang ang wala.

Nakakatawa. Para akong sintu-sinto. Nakakatakot sa ganitong antas pero wala akong magagawa. Nakasanayan ko na ito. Ang maghanda kada Valentines.

Ito ang iisang araw sa isang taon na hinihintay ko. Corny, cheesy, baduy, o kung ano pang term ang naiisip mo, sabihin mo lang. Ito na ang araw ko. Wala kang pakialam.

Alam ko naman kung nasaan ka ngayon. Kasama mo ang boyfriend mo sa kung saang pampublikong pasyalan. Siguro kumakain din kayo. Siguro may tsokolate ka din at bulaklak. Siguro nasubukan mo na ang gusto mong pabango na ang boypren mo ang nagbigay.


Ayos lang. Diyan ka na lang. Happy Valentines sayo.

Matutunaw ang tsokolate, malalanta ang bulaklak, mag-e-evaporate ang pabango, at maluluma ang stuff toy.

Pero ang pag-ibig ko? Hindi magbabago.

Sa susunod na taon na lang ulit. Baka sakaling matanggap mo na ang mga inihanda ko para sa iyo.

Legga Più...